Review: This Radiant Boy

This Radiant Boy
“Proud to be a Chemist”
(Ides of March)

I’ve been sick for the last three days.  Everything is sort of blurry because of the Ny Quil shots I’ve been slamming every half-hour.  I hate snot running down my nose.  I hate my bloodshot eyes feeling like they’re on fire.  I hate my throat feeling like it’s about to crack.  I hate This Radiant Boy.  What sort of Saturday Morning punk rock is this?  Sappy, smarmy, without an edge, without a purpose or a message, totally lacking in originality and talent, This Radiant Boy comes to us by way of Philadelphia and I wish they’d have stayed there.  Vocalist Mike Guggino has a falsetto that makes Tiny Tim sound like Jim Morrison.  Who wants to listen to that sniveling, whining stuff?  Mix in the sugary mid-tempo chords and the requisite distortion and you’ve got yourself one stinker of a compact disc.  Hold on for a second, I’ve got to blow my nose…damn, out of Kleenex…I’ll just use this here ridiculous, quasi-Dexter’s Laboratory album cover…there we go.  Where was I?  Oh yeah, this is an annoying record and I’d rather take a nap than listen to it again.