Good Clean Fun
““Straight Outta Hardcore””
(Phryte Records)
Bah, this is horrible. Granted, I may not be the best judge of a sXe CD considering my love for meat and drugs, but I would hope I’d know a little about music. First of all, someone go up to Washington D.C. and bitchslap these fuckers into believing THEY ARE NOT JUDGE. Once GCF deals with that ego blow, they might change their style to something more original. That said, let’s break down a song or two. ‘The Ice Cream Man Cometh’ is “based on an inspirational true story. In 1991, in a suburban Syracuse, New York, neighborhood a group of 11 year old kids convinced their ice cream man to carry vegan treats.” After I read that, I blew bong water all over my carpet from laughing (I was pulling a bowl). Now I got stinky carpet! These kids are going right next to Rosa Parks in the history books. Anyways, the song sucks. This whole album is off, way off. Let me ask a question! How can you be so anti meat and ‘poison’, yet use permanent pens (pretty poisonous, and totally non-biodegradable last I checked) to write those big dumb Grandmas-telephone sized X’s on your hands? Your clothing, your computer, everything around you produces toxic fumes and waste that pollutes the environment, slowly killing everything. Holly shit! This CD is made from plastic! I’d better burn it before anyone gets an aneurysm trying to figure out the hypocritical backwards style of some of this ‘straight edge movement’.
