Review: Gunfighter/Traindodge

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Gunfighter/Traindodge
“Split CD”
(Ascetic Records)

Since both artists contributed only two songs, I’m just going to do a stream of consciousness thing here-sort of like that one part in Flaubert’s “Madam Bovary” with the carriage ride through the city.  Here goes…
Track#1-Quick; fast; a line from that “I’m on a Mexican radio” song, more distortion and more minor chords…
Track#2-Spacey guitar riff similar to Smashing Pumpkin’s ‘Quiet’ off of “Siamese Dream”; soft lullaby vocals; ham sandwiches; Yahtzee; oh-now fast and loud-lots of Smashing Pumpkins influences; Steven King’s “Gunslinger” series; name of the track is ‘Run Angel Run’-reminds me of “Run Lola Run”…
Track#3-Foo Fighters?  Oh, now they sound like an even crappier Red Hot Chili Peppers; losing interest, still losing interest; heavy bass lines; my roommate eating all of the homemade strawberry jam my grandma sent me; is this song still going?…
Track#4-Good Lord, this is the worst review I’ve ever written; is it really my fault though? I mean, I can only work with the material I’m given; I feel like The Joker’s plastic surgeon when he apologetically points to his bloody, rusted knives and says, ‘You see what I have to work with here…’
What say we pretend this little review never happened?  That would be great for me because then I could pretend I never had to waste twenty minutes of my life listening to this heinous piece of garbage.